daughtersofnormabates











{May 29, 2013}   Dear Aunt Carrie

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An aunt (by marriage) confronted me on my blog, accusing me of lying. This is an open letter to her.

May 26, 2013

Dear “Aunt Carrie”,

I received your comment on my blog. You have accused me of lying about the abuse I suffered. You were not present in my childhood home and you do not know what went on between my mother and myself. I stand by the stories that I have written–they are absolutely true.  If you have any proof that I am “lying” other than what Mother has told  you, please come forth with your evidence.

Even Mother’s recent behavior shocks any normal person. My father’s funeral was February 4, 2012. Mother mailed me a letter of termination from my father’s company, certified and dated February 10, 2012, five days after Daddy’s burial. I ask you, would a decent mother do this to her daughter? I did not even have a week to grieve my father’s death before Mother cancelled my health insurance, with full knowledge that I have a pre-existing condition, making private insurance unavailable to me. What loving mother does that to her own daughter? A couple of weeks later, she  closed the savings account containing my son’s college money, saved for him by my father since his birth. I have bank records that prove she did that.  What decent, loving grandmother does that? In your message, you imply that I am jealous of the love in my parent’s marriage. But ask yourself–how can a woman who inherited the money a man labored in his life for–never working a job herself–refuse to spend some of that money on a headstone for his grave when he dies? Is this what a loving wife does?

If you want to defend a woman who does this to her daughter, a woman who never tried to contact her own grandson while he was growing up, never sent a card or gift, never called, never attended a school event, including his high school graduation, you are welcome to do so. If you want to stand beside a woman who withholds college funds saved for her own grandson, attempting to cripple his ability to complete his education, go ahead and side with her. If you must believe that Mother is incapable of beating me and behaving as I claim, believe what you will. I stand in the light of truth.

I believe that by confronting me on my blog to accuse me of lying shows that you have been lied to and wish to perpetuate those lies. To behave so aggressively toward me simply because I decided to tell the truth about what happened to me, indicates that you have been deceived.

I have been open and honest in everything I have said and have never hidden behind a false email address to snipe at others. There is no healing without truth. I hope that one day you will be able to accept the truth. Until that time, please do turn your “poison pen” in my direction again.

Lynnygal

Daddy's Grave, 2013

Daddy’s Grave, 2013

 

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Effie Lou says:

My dear sweet Lynn,

It is so very sad that on top of the horrific abuse you suffered your entire life, at the hands of your ‘Mother’, you must now endure the poison arrows of those who seek to perpetuate lies, and who choose to ignore the solid truth of your experience. Having personally witnessed several instances of the unadulterated venom and relentless abuse you were constantly covered with, there is no doubt as to the truth of your statements. Your courage in the face of all the backlash from those who choose to deny truth is amazing, especially that which is coming from ‘family’ members. Seriously? How do these creatures look in the mirror? Or sleep? Perhaps they have one of those Snow White mirrors?
You are my REAL sister and you are a fantastic mother, person and friend. It is a pity that so many will go to their graves never having examined their lives and denying all truths, not just yours. What a horrible waste. Oh well, let them go on, sitting on the front row, pretending to score points with God, entrenched in their McMansions and needless SUVs which never leave the pavement , thinking themselves safe from all the ‘truth and reality’.
You have already come out on top my dear. With any luck at all they may come to at least strive for enlightenment. Just maybe. Regardless, you have done the finest job as a mother and person, and you have saved your own self. You are the real winner in all of this so let them live on in delusion. Already I can hear their what their death screams will sound like. God help them all.

Love you forever and ever!
Effie



CGJ says:

I am not hiding behind anything or anyone that would be you Lynn. Yes I am a family member
by marriage. A marriage of 55 years 4 children, 10 grandchildren and five great-grandchildren.
I will stand firm your parents never abused you. Your grandmother, God rest her soul
would never believe how you have treated her daughter.
This is the only way of reaching you because you live behind a wall of seclusion.
I would suggest that you not contact me again as I have nothing else to say to you.
You can tell your friend I don’t live in a world of delusion. I live in a world of Love,family
and truth. I don’t need to have anyone’s pity to have friends. If you give love that’s is what you
get back. I am sorry but I have no feelings for or against you or your son.
Carole



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